Connection is important. Feeling seen, known and understood is a deep seated need for all of us. We are hard wired with a need to feel loved, and to belong. Unfortunately, we do not fully know how to connect anymore, nor is connection as coveted as it should be. We are entering a world that has never been seen before with technology becoming the ultimate goal for connection. However, this is a false connection.
False Connection
With social media, there is a continual striving to be seen, known or “liked” that sets our standard of value. If we have thousands of “likes” from across the world it signifies a higher value. Why? It fills a need to connect, to be seen. When we reach for the phone to check our instagram or facebook, what is the motivation? We are looking to see if anyone has “liked” us, if we have been accepted or noticed. This is a short lived high when we see a “like” or recognition. It fuels a technology addiction of needing more, wanting more and brings about comparison. This false connection leaves us feeling lonelier than before and needing to perform to live up to the standards of people who may not even know or have had hardly any personal interaction with. Our lives become dictated by what others think of us. This can have a devastating impact on our lives.
Real Connection
Connection does not come from a large following on social media. True connection starts with spending time with yourself, connecting with your heart, being aware of your needs, and finding ways to meet those needs in healthy ways. When you are connected to yourself, you are then able to connect with others. At this point, you will not be expecting others to speak to your value, but instead to enhance your life. Real connection comes from finding people who you are able to be vulnerable with. This connection allows you to share your heart, your dreams, your desires, and people where you can be fully yourself. Performing to please someone or to be someone that people expect you to be kills real connection. When you find the people you can do life with, those who see you in your worst moments and still choose to love you, then you will find what your destiny and what you were created for.
Technology is great, until it isn’t. The next time you reach for your phone or computer to check social media, check your heart. Ask why. If you are lonely, hurting or in pain, contact a friend instead to meet for coffee or an art show. True connection starts with connecting with yourself to know your needs so you can truly connect with others and allow them in.
*You were made on purpose for a purpose!
